-takes a deep breath- Life is at a turning point you could say. A big part of my life is another state, another world, living it without me while I sit here trying to get my own life together. Its hard at times but even harder when I'm vunerable. I think about quitting my band everyday. Its just not how it used to be, the music for me has become all about me to the point that my bandmates are oblivious to the vision. Its so involved into my own self that the others dont understand entirely. I think I've outgrown them. I need a place to record by myself for myself. I need to make some calls.
-closes eyes, taking a break from the blaring screen- I had a dream last night. I was in this glass elevator or something very futuristic looking with a young girl with short blonde hair that had these big blue eyes. The elevator is completely made of glass and we appear to be passing by a park that strangely resembles new york city. Below, I'd say a good 50 feet, is a man with long course hair on the sides and balding on the top. He's got a gun, I see it in his hands but I dont say anything. He lifts his hand up slowly and smiling, he begins to shoot the pistol at our elevator, aiming for me. I run for the door but its stuck and I can only open it to an extent before it refuses to open any farther. The shots are ringing out very close as I start to panic. The door budges just so I can put my body in, so i shove my upper torso into the crack and begin to pry my way through the broken door. Miraculously I make it through and land on the floor safely escaping the bullets. The room I'm in is solid and not made of glass. I turn and focus on the girl who is still in the room where the bullets seem to never cease firing. I put my hand through the crack of the broken see-through door and reach my hand out, begging for her to grab my hand. She makes it just to the door where my hand is when a single bullet enters her head at the temple and exits out the other side accompanied by a single drip of blood that runs down the side of her cheek from the exit wound. Her eyes pierce onto mine as grief hits me like a brick. The girl just slides down, lifeless. The dream ends shortly after.